Motivation Monday Can Suck a Dick

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Motivation Monday Can Suck a Dick - My Name is April

I’ve written in the past about the joys of getting back on the bike after being sick, but in hindsight I feel pretty damn stupid. Because that wasn’t sick. Oh no, what I had back then can barely be considered a goddamn sniffle compared to what I have recently suffered at the hands of.

I’m talking about…influenza [gasp]. Never again will I complain of the flu when all I have is a mere cold. The flu is so, so, so much worse. I want you to promise me, you will never use the flu diagnosis in vain? Promise me!

It started the weekend of my spectacular victory at the Nicol Jackson Women’s Series. What I had put down to race fatigue took a turn for the worse come Monday. I struggled through the day with the assistance of bulk ibuprofen, and then was never seen or heard from again…until the following Tuesday where I then finally started showing my face at work and on the gram.

I had a total of 3 weeks off the bike, away from pilates and out of the gym. And now I am paying for it. Not only has my body gone to flub, fitness disappeared and possess an irrefutable wheeze anytime my heart rate goes over 140; any and all motivation I had managed to accumulate for cycling has also gone on hiatus.

Getting sick enough to truly impact your performance on the bike is the worst thing that can happen to you, right next to being swooped by a swoopy boi.

Motivation Monday Can Suck a Dick - My Name is April

The amount of motivation I have lost from it is a pain in the ass. People do not appreciate the amount of time and effort it takes to muster up motivation and enthusiasm for something. That shit is exhausting all on its own without the added effort of actually doing the work you built up motivation for.

But someone needs to pave the way right? I guess that is where I come in with this blog. I can’t just bitch and moan to you people, I need to come to you with solutions. So, I did some searching for ways to get motivation back, and here are some of the tips and tricks I found:

  • Get a giant poster of Lance Armstrong, and pin it to your bedroom wall.
    Motivation Monday Can Suck a Dick - My Name is April
  • Source some black market EPO and use someone else’s blood motivation to get you back on track.

     

  • Plan out a 200km ride with 5000m elevation and only take 2 water bottles. While you’re out there searching for mercy find some fucking form you lazy piece of shit.

Motivation Monday Can Suck a Dick - My Name is April

  • Just give up on your cycling dreams, invest in a push up bra and start sending in pics to Cycling_Queens. Likes > bikes amirite?Motivation Monday Can Suck a Dick - My Name is April
  • Use that $1400 you were saving for an 8 ball on a direct drive trainer instead under the pretense it will make you train more.

Motivation Monday Can Suck a Dick - My Name is April

 

Let me know how you go if you use any of my tips or tricks! I can’t wait to see the results you achieve!

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